Beautiful

"You are beautiful, no matter what they say. Words can't bring you down."

"I am beautiful in every single way. Words can't bring me down... So don't you bring me down today."

 [My first day in the classroom: Practicum of freshman year!]

One of the first things that was said to me by a couple of the girls in my new first grade class was, "Wow, Miss Ries, you are beautiful." or "You are so pretty!"

Those words made such a difference in my day. 

Who would have thought that a compliment by three little first grade girls could have changed my day? Normally it means a lot coming from someone of the opposite gender and approximately the same age as yourself... But in all reality, it means just the same thing and it's the same exact truth coming from little girls of the age of 7. 

Insecurities come mostly from lack of encouragement. 

And I think that's the biggest area that I've struggled with since being at Asbury. 

I find myself comparing myself to all of my friends, thinking most of the time that I have crazy beautiful friends, so it's no wonder that I don't have a guy that likes me because all of my friends are just that much more gorgeous.

But I've found that in the classroom I can completely be myself, plain and simple, and beautiful to little first graders. I'm completely content with that!

And I also know that God made me beautiful and good. 

Therefore I don't always need to be told, because it is explicitly said in His Word that I am beautiful in His sight, and through Him, so what more could I want or need?

To continue talking about the first day of class though...

It seriously was one of the most amazing days of the year. I am working with Mrs. Dix at Brookside Elementary School. She is one of the sweetest teachers that I have ever met! I think I will really enjoy working with her... Another neat God story regarding the placement of my practicum: I am the only student in my class that got my ideal class age. How cool is that? And it's just another way I see God working in my life and confirming the fact that I am supposed to be going into Elementary Education! There are also other doors opening for missions work during the summer, which is exactly what I feel like God has placed on my heart. It's so neat following after God's perfect plan for my life!

I digress...

There were so many fun teaching techniques that I observed, just from being in Mrs. Dix's classroom for one day. And I'm really excited to continue learning, observing, and possibly even teaching a little bit in her classroom! The children are precious. As I've already observed, there are going to be a few students that will test my patience  and teach me different ways that I can deal with less-than-perfect students, but that is all part of teaching! 

Let me just say... I cannot wait to have a classroom of my own! I cannot wait to decorate my room... Implement the skills that I will have learned... Change kids lives... Make them into beautiful little children who have such a love to learn, just like Miss Braham did to me.

Never underestimate the impact you can have on kids, as well as kids can have on you.

Three specific little girls completely made my day on Wednesday.

And it just confirmed the truth that God's word tells me...

I am beautiful.

And I'm telling every single one of you that is reading it:

You are beautiful; never forget that!

Facebook-less

Today has been Day 1, and I can honestly say it's been one of the most difficult days... More than likely because Facebook was literally at my fingertips for a good 50% of the day. Yet, I didn't.

And I couldn't be more proud of myself for that.

[Excusing the fact that a friend of mine changed my password, so I couldn't have gotten on it even if I want to!]

Why did I give up Facebook? 

The one thing that I did keep from my life in Indiana.

I needed to.

That's it.

Plain and simple.

Too often I found that it was taking up precious and valuable time that I could have been working on school work, planning lessons for my kids, initiating conversations with people, enhancing relationships with REAL people, not simply virtually.

Instead, my challenge to myself is as follows:

Every time I have that desire to go on Facebook to see what's going on in the world [because obviously I can't find that out any other way...] I am going to go get my Bible and read Psalms. The book of praises. Words inspired by God, written by man so that I can read them. How much better news can I get than that? I'm pretty sure what I can gleam from Psalms is significantly more than anything that I could gleam from Facebook. At this point, I'll be getting through Psalms multiple times before these 40 days are over, but you know what, what better way to spend my time than meditating on God's word. After all, His word is infallible. It cannot be wrong. It can be convicting, but in a good way. It cannot harm. It's perfect.

If you're reading this, I challenge you to do the same thing! Maybe not give up Facebook, but think about something that you spend a lot of time doing... Maybe it's Twitter... Pinterest... Texting... Myspace (is that even still around?)... Gaming systems (PS2 [that probably dates me A LOT!], Wii, Xbox, I don't know what else is out there!]... Fictional books... You name it. Anything that could possibly be taking away from valuable time that you could be spending in the Word of God. After all, if God took the time to inspire all of those words for us, the LEAST we can do is to read them. Then we should take it even a step farther and apply them to our lives, and have it reflect in our day to day actions and words.

That is my challenge to myself as well as you. If you're reading this, I encourage you to keep me accountable! I want to be the kind of person that it is evident that I am following and seeking after Christ, especially now that I have given up Facebook, and hopefully it will continue nurturing as I progress in this wonderful relationship with God!

God is in Control

Life has it's ups and downs.

Normally when we think of them, they're mostly trivial, right?

And most everything that I'm experiencing right now I will look back and see how trivial they are.

But for now, they're life changing.

They're shaping me.

They're molding me.

They're changing me.

And it can't be more true... Never would I have imagined that I would be where I am today, last year. This is in a good and bad way. I have grown more in my relationship with Christ than I ever thought was possible, and that's incredibly encouraging. My relationship with Jesus means so much to me. Seriously, without Him I do not think I would have gotten through everything that has transpired. As I have struggled and wrestled with different things, I have realized that God is the one constant in my life; nothing that I do can waver anything that He feels or says or does or loves to/about me. 

There's been a lot of difficulties recently. Some of which most people do not even know are transpiring. [Problem #1, as I've held stuff in, but sometimes I just can't help it!] But it just seemed like every little thing kept adding up, to the point where I was sure I was going to blow. 

What did I do? 

I went home.

I needed to get away. I needed to remove myself from any and all situations. I needed to take a step back. I needed to leave.

I needed to go to that little city that has become such a part of my family called Bristol, because whether I really like it or not [which I have grown to like it because of the people!], it's home. I'll be content wherever God has my family.

 

And I honestly think that was the best thing that I could have done. I've been able to think about it without talking to anyone else, or having anyone elses thoughts/opinions effect my own. I've been able to pray about it and give it over to God. I've been able to move on.

Everything seemed to be falling apart. Literally.

Friendships.

Relationships.

Emotionally.

Physically.

Spiritually.

I couldn't have felt more dead and drained.

So much of that changed by a single facebook message.

Never under estimate the power of a message letting a person know that you REALLY, genuinely, truly care about them. It seriously has made all the difference in the world to me.

My track record with guys have not been the greatest. Yes, in those current times, I thought I had good judgment, and I'm not saying that I did anything wrong in getting to know these guys, but it's how I've went about it that was difficult. In the past if I was friends with a guy, I normally wanted to know if they "like me," in the way that all the middle school girls annoyingly ask and whine about. Pathetic, I know. But that all change…

Through a facebook message that I received because I SAW] for the very first time a guy who is genuinely interested in my life for ME.  [Such a big part in maturing in the aspect of relationships, I feel like… because it wasn’t necessarily the first time some guy has cared for me in this way, but it’s the first time I REALIZED it] Not for anything else. But because he cares about me; not in a romantic way, but in a friendship-brotherly way. There was nothing he asked that didn't show that he really wanted to know how I was. Every little thing that he said was completely genuine.

For probably the first time ever, I felt genuinely special because of something that a guy has said to me. [Not to discount sweet things that I have heard at all, but this just... struck a completely different chord than anything else I’ve ever heard, if that makes sense... If you’re a guy and you’re reading this, it probably doesn’t, so I’d suggest moving on pretty quickly and not over analyzing it!]

This simple message changed everything. Changed how I am viewing a specific relationship right now. Changed how I approach friendships. Changed my response to different things that have gone on around me.

Not to say that I won't have difficult times after this, because I am almost positive I will, but I think my attitude will be a little bit different from here on out.

I don't really even know if any of this makes sense, or if it simply just me rambling on and on. 

I'm really thankful for all of these hardships I've experience this semester alone... If anything, they have strengthened my relationship with Christ more than the "offending person" could even know. I have relied on Christ more than anything because I know He is my perfect love. 

I'm working through my personal doubts and fears that have appeared because of certain situations...

I'm working on becoming less dependent on what other people thing.

I'm working on my insecurities.

I'm working on realizing that I don't have to be perfect. It's alright to make mistakes.

But through it all I know there are people who are coaching me, encouraging me, and walking along side of me through the whole way because they GENUINELY care about me.

There are always lessons to be learned, and prices to be paid, but ultimately I had a God who died for me and paid the ultimate price out of love. No greater act of love could ever be shown.

 Because after all... These troubles and hardships... Well, they're just temporary and...

God is in control.